Tuesday, February 16, 2010

"Strength"



There are A LOT of definitions for strength, but I am not talking about someone who can bench 500+lbs. This has nothing to do with that, I am talking about someone who possesses the following qualities [according to Oxford American Dictionaries]

Strength | stre NG (k) ; stren |
NOUN
1 The quality or state of being strong, in particular
*physical power & energy
*the emotional or mental qualities necessary in dealing with situations or events that are distressing or difficult.


You might say yah well anyone can deal with "hard times" everyone has them, no biggie. Yah everyone does have them, this has to do w.how people deal with those hard times. This person, lets call her, Hannah, seems to have had more then most, in my opinion, very close together. It not only takes strength, but a whole lot of CLASS to face the situations how said person has.

I have seen her loose not one but two grandparents. Not one but TWO very close friends, one being a BEST FRIEND. One was no older then 19 and was lost to a rare cancer. The other was in his early 20's, lost tragically to a motorcycle accident. Shortly there after his mother who was very ill, passed. From my knowledge she was close to his family. Shortly after his mother passed his father did too. *[I know there are a few other passings, I am sry- I know Hannah reads this; They are not insignificant, I just have a bad memory]

She like other girls has had break-ups over the years. They hurt but she moved on, she was young. Until recently. She & her beau of over 3 years called it quits. There were many reasons, all leading to him. They lived together, they had mutual friends, etc.

Things ended & we all saw a different side of him, a side that we never thought we would see. A side that completely disgusted us. But that also let a side of Hannah shine through. A side I knew was there, but that she had tucked away the past 2 years.

They had been together for over 3 but there in the end her STRONG, INDEPENDENT side had started to peak though like a diamond peaks through coal. She has been such a class act. She has never once lost her cool. she has never once slung mud. When her ex came to gather his belongings with a co-worker an she stayed out of the way. They did not argue, did not cause a scene, b/c she did not pick a fight.

They have stayed cordial b/c of her relationship with his family. After 3+ years they too are like HER extended family. In this case the apple fell and rolled far from the tree b/c he is nothing like his family [expressing my opinion here- Don't hurt my friends!].

I admire how she has handled the situation, and herself. She has not curled up and "died". She has taken steps to re-decorate her home, slowly, as her budget allows. To help her create new memories. She has had a few "get togethers" & house guests (new memories). She has continued to live life, TO THE FULLEST. She even has multiple trips planed.

She has made the decision to 'find herself' before she 'finds someone else'. For that too, applaud her. I am one to not be alone & used to run to open arms. She is looking at herself, and learning herself. She is really doing it, this transition from a "we to me" has not & is still not easy for her. She is taking it day by day. She knows what to do on hard days, she has worked through them & now knows what to do when she has one. They are fewer now. She is doing a wonderful job on her [new] journey.

I don't normally do things like this but, I choose to highlight "Hannah" today, but to keep her identity secret [unless you know her personally], b/c my admiration for her is so tremendously high. I have told her, how much I admire her but I don't think she really understands. I thought this would be a good way to get my point across. I have notified her, to read today.

I have never been in her shoes, so I don't fully understand, I try but can't. I don't even pretend too, it's not fair to her. I have had bad break-ups, but never after a 3+yr relationship. I was happy about my divorce so no comparison there. I know if I was in her shoes I would not handle it as well or as classy as she. I am all about revenge. I'm very spiteful. An eye for an eye. Horrible I know.

We can all learn a thing or two from Hannah. If you know her, as I do, you know what I mean.

*Hannah... I am sorry that you have had to go trough the things you have in your life... you're so young [as am I... not trying to sound older/wiser/etc]. I wish you haven't. You're such a model of class & strength. Thank you. Your parents raised you well. You can only get classier & stronger from here!!!

...

You know what the rest of the week is... W-T-F

See you tomorrow...

Don't miss a beat, keep up in between posts, I Tweet , are we friends?

xo

Kandid Kelli

3 comments:

Jessica said...

Love this post!

Nicole said...

I 100% agree with everything you've said. I would have not been 1/2 of the strength and poise she's shown through this tough time. My hat's off to her.

Katie said...

This is a fabulous post. And I agree with everything you said. "Hannah" is by far one of the strongest people I know. She should be so proud of herself.