"Groundhog's Day"

"Mama...meme up...Mama... Ma!!!" That is usually what resonates from the monitor anywhere from 630-715, Daily. Without fail. I grumble something to Matt, if he is still in bed, he asks me what I just said. But it doesn't matter, I roll [literally] out of bed and go stumbling, stomping bounding into E's room, with a smile, like ive been waiting awake, for her to wake up.

As soon as I touch the handle on her door I know if I walk in there w.anything BUT a smile we will have a bad day. My attitude, first thing in the AM sets the tone for the whole day. Don't get me wrong, I AM NOT CHIPPER in the morning, nor am I HAPPY to be awake. But I do want to have a positive, happy, fun day. Also E is the happiest she is going to be ALL day first thing in the AM. She has just gotten anywhere from 10.5-12 hrs of sleep! How can I not smile when I see her, full of smiles?!

I change her, we are STILL NOT potty trained. [I hope that when we move back to FL in June, things will be a little easier, as we will be in our own place and not living w/grandparents- yes I am moving back- thats a whole different post] I am also not really in a rush, I have learned that there is no rush to force her to do anything, when she does it on her own, she is far more successful. I digress.

Then we get a cup of milk and go snuggle in my room. We usually watch one of her TV shows on DVD- then when snuggle time is over, she takes her "baba"(pacifier) and squirt (her ratty 2y/o pinkish elephant) back to her room & we venture out to the kitchen for breakfast.

Being the hard headed independent child she is, she insists on deciding on her breakfast and THEN she picks if she wants to sit in "boos chair" (the high chair) or her booster seat. All the while this decision process is occurring, I am prepping the coffee maker to hit the "ON" button. I have it down to a science and can get this done in the time it takes my 2 y/o to make her decisions & still have control over the situation in the kitchen. Groggy or not. I. AM. GOOD.

Once she has made her final decision I sit next to her and I check the interwebz and drink that magical potion I just concocted a few minutes prior...COFFEE. Once my child has eaten picked at her food enough to satisfy me. Off she & her sippy cup go! and Goes and goes until 1030/45 and then thats Nap #1.

During her nap I: try and get as much school work done, laundry (ours and hers... separate loads), Dishes, and misc. straightening up/ things that need to be done. I also get myself dressed and looking presentable (I shower in the PM). I try and clean-up her disasters but the minute she wakes up she is FULL of energy and ready to destroy. She is like a hurricane or Tornado.

Our afternoons are some what of a whirlwind: (The TV or Radio/CDs is ALWAYS on- I need something other then just toddler babble) wake-up from nap, get her dressed, Lunch, play outside for a few (weather permitting), inside to wind down and have a snack & play. [If I have errands that need to be done they are done during this time- thats rare] Then somewhere between 330/4 is NAP#2... YES I have a 2 naps a day type of kid.

Nap#2 I work on more school work but I like to be selfish [if I can] and catch up on my TV show(s).

As of late my FIL has been getting home around 430/5 so I try more for the 330 lay down, so she gets atleast an hr. -- Wakes up, gets changed. Socks, shoes & a pony and out we go for some more out doors time till dinner.

After the most annoying, oscar award worthy performance & tiring hr of my life dinner, is tubbie time. Usually kiddo takes off like a bat out of hell for the tub or begs during dinner for a tubs, but as of late (I LOVE HAVING A 2y/o) she runs and hides. We play with bubbles and toys in the tub- WE SPLASH. We get our jams on play a little more if she is in the mood we read a book. Then like clockwork she asks for a "cup & nap" she goes and gives nightnight kisses. She still gets some milk b/c of her lack of food consumption & is in bed by no later then 8:10.

From there its mommy & daddy time. U.N.T.I.L she wakes up around 11 or so and I have to go in and console her and make her lay back down. Then I have a love affair with my pillow. Before I know it -- "Mama...meme up...Mama... Ma!!!" is that time, AGAIN? Where did my precious sleep time go?

I realized last week, when I told my bestie , that my week/weekend was mundane [again], I feel as if I am living groundhogs day , there isn't even the slightest variation to my days anymore. I love my daughter and I love that we are blessed enough that I can stay home with her while I am in Grad School. I always said I wanted to stay home with my kids till they were in pre-school. I know children are creatures of routine but hers is so rigid lately that I wonder how that happened?

I never expected being a SAHM to be glamorous but i've been doing it for 2 years now, but more so as of late and SOMETHING has to change & it will but slowly b/c poor girl has had soo many changes, her routine might be her security thing.

When she was smaller, I had her on a feeding/sleeping schedule but NOTHING like this one. It is almost suffocating. I feel as if I somehow slipped and hit the repeat button on the CD player and I am living life on repeat- day in, day out.

You may be on the other side of your computer screen scoffing, thinking "she has it SOOO easy" scoff all you want, until you live it. Not only is the redundancy killing me but so is the loneliness. I may have a partner but I still feel like I do a lot of it alone.

...
Ive gotta go learn about some pilgrims... I don't know as much as I thought. If Im going to be teaching it I need to know it.

Don't miss a beat, keep up in between posts, I Tweet , are we friends?

xo

Kandid Kelli