Monday, February 14, 2011

"Valentines Day"


A year ago today, the man I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with made that wish a reality, when he proposed to me. (read about it here).

Then things happened and some how we did not survive the things. We don't even talk now. He blocked me on FB, I blocked his phone number.

How it got so bad is beyond me. When just 1 year ago we were "so in love", taking the big step towards forever.

I had been in love with M for over 3 1/2 years at that time,  we started out as friends and out relationship grew, but the same way our relationship grew and a bond formed between us a bond never formed between my parents and him.

I am a huge family person and the lack of a bond between my family and M it put a rift in our "bullet-proof" relationship. There were other things but that seemed to be the most prominent.

I have never been really big on Valentines day, I feel that if you love someone, you should show them daily, not once a year.

I had also never had a really good vday, until it became the day M proposed to me and I thought that was the first day of the rest of our lives. I had vowed to love/ celebrate that day forever; Until Sept. 7 months after said proposal, I ended things.

When I did that I didn't even think about Feb. 14 2011. -- This is the first vday I have been alone since 2003. At first thought I was sad, then I realized that vday was never a favorite of mine, even when I had someone, b/c I  think you should show your love daily.

Today, my daughter is my valentine. I love her more than words can describe, and I SHOW HER DAILY, so I think its fitting.

A valentine does not have to be a s/o- it can be someone you love dearly, like a child.

I hope that soon I will find/be with someone who is willing to show me daily, how he feels about me, not just 1 day a year. Until then, its just my girl and I and that is enough for me.

I hope everyone has a wonderful VDay, if you celebrate it, if not, have a great Monday, I know I will- only 10days left of suffering through 2 jobs.


Keep up in between posts, I Tweet , A lot.

-Kandid Kelli

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