Thursday, August 12, 2010

"Good Jealousy"


Usually when you hear about jealousy its in a bad context. Not this time.

Being in my mid-20's all of my friends are the same age, give or take a year or two. We are all at the stage in our lives where we are looking to, or are, starting our CAREERS, not just some job. As we've been graduating from college, like dominos falling since late 2008. 

As most [all] of you know when I graduated I was already a mother. My career choices [or lack there of, thanks economy!] were limited, to no traveling. I was am a single mother. 

Jobs that had me traveling were out of the question. Completely. I had family help, to an extent, there was an agreement that I was not to take a job that had me traveling, as E is my child and I was/am the one to raise her.

/SN: I found out I was pregnant about a month after my 21st birthday, E was born 2 months before my 22nd. I have never really known what it was like to be a 'free 20-something'. Although I have never once regretted the decision I made to have a child, young, I have regretted marrying her biological father. endSN/

Anyways since all these graduations I have been hearing: "The world is your oyster..." Over & over. Meaning,  you have the ability to achieve anything you want. 

Not saying that the world isn't mine, it is to a certain extent... but this isn't about me. As much as it may sound like it is. 

I am jealous of my friends/family, but in a good way. Because they aren't 'tied-down' [say with a child] they can literally go anywhere & do anything. 

What an awesome feeling that must be. 

I want them to succeed. 
I want them to do magnificent things & have magical stories.
I want to live vicariously through them. 

But most of all I want them to fulfill their dreams. 

I made the big move to PA earlier  this yr, I tried to be 'free', but I was unhappy. I believe once you have a child family is important. The time to be 'wild & free' is before you have children. 

You've heard that once you have children, you settle down and that is true.

TMy friends & family: I wish you the best on you're new endeavors. I hope you have wonderful adventures & bring back great magical stories. Don't be scared to go, just and go live, live your life while you can! We will always be here, with open loving arms for you. 'Home' is your safe place, you can always come back if things don't work, but how will you know if you don't try. I love you & want you to succeed and most importantly BE HAPPY.   

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Keep up in between posts, I Tweet , A lot.

xo
-Kandid Kelli


3 comments:

Anonymous said...

A friend of mine and I just had a long conversation about this the other day. Here's the conclusion we arrived at: someone is always going to have something else that you want. It could be as small as an iPhone or as big as a baby. It doesn't matter. The fact is, we're dealt the hand we are dealt. That's it. There's no changing cards. You just have to play the hand. It sucks sometimes, but you have to be thankful for what you have and, like you said, encourage and be happy for the people who are doing the things you would love to do.

Great post.

xoxo

Hayley said...

I do not appreciate you making me cry at 12:45 in the afternoon. Just sayin. Love you.

Anonymous said...

Beautiful, Kelli! Such a challenge these days, it seems, for so many people to not only want what you have and have what you want[beautiful little E, an education for yourself], but to also want others to have what you don't! ...If that even made sense? LoL. I'm just saying it's beautiful for you to be happy with where your life has lead you, and also to be sweet enough to want others to enjoy the things that are not within your scope anymore. I think it's lovely. And such a tribute to the Christian that you are, as well!